Bruce the Blog

 Our family feels infinitely fulfilled after Friday night’s Celebrate Yorktown! awards ceremony and dinner-dance party hosted by Yorktown Chamber of Commerce at Colonial Terrace. Honored were that venue’s owners Sheila + Alan Drogy as Business Persons of the Year, Harrison Apar Field of Dreams Foundation as Service Organization of the Year and Club Fit owners David Swope, Beth Beck, Bill Beck Jr. and Ellen Koelsch as recipients of Chase Media Group’s John W. Chase Award for Business and Community Leadership.

In a Sunday newspaper article about children of Yorktown whose deaths were not the result of natural causes, Jeffrey Veatch, the father of deceased teenager Justin Veatch, remarks that the singular fear of the cohort of parents who lose children is having their progeny forgotten in time.

That explains as well as any observation the motivation that possesses people who cannot help but become self-centered — even narcisstic — parents such as Elyse and I, if only in the interest of keeping the child’s spirit and name alive as long as possible. If such narcissism can be excused or justified, it’s because that’s all you have left of the child.

Seeing others receive proclamations at these events from elected officials is one thing. Actually being the recipient of such parchment, with your son’s name inscribed on each, is quite another feeling. We are thankful to Congressman John Hall, State Senator Vincent Leibell, State Assemblyman Greg Ball, Westchester County Executive Rob Astorino and Chief of Staff George Oros, Westchester County Legislators Michael Kaplowitz and John Testa, Yorktown Supervisor Susan Siegel and the town board, and Cortlandt Supervisor Linda Puglisi and the town board, for issuing proclamations to all the honorees.

Right now, before we shuttle them to Westchester Airport to return to Florida, Harrison’s grandparents, Elyse and I are off to the County Center in White Plains, because after all, thanks to the aforementioned officials of Westchester County, today, February 7, 2010, is Harrison Apar Field of Dreams Foundation Day in Westchester, just as the Drogys and the Club Fit families, as is customary, have been accorded their respective days.  We of course will treasure all the honors forever, in behalf of Harrison and the wonderful community that supports his Foundation’s efforts to make this — even in the smallest way — a wonderful world.

Herewith is what I said to the 300 attendees at the February 5, 2010 Awards Dinner and Party of Yorktown Chamber of Commerce upon receiving our award:

Acceptance Remarks

By Bruce Apar

After Presentation To Harrison Apar Field Of Dreams Foundation

As 2010 Service Organization Of The Year

By Yorktown (N.Y.) Chamber Of Commerce

February 5, 2010

Colonial Terrace

Cortlandt Manor, Westchester County, N.Y.

Thanks to the Yorktown Chamber of Commerce and its president Joe Visconti.

Congratulations of course to my friends Sheila and Alan Drogy of Colonial Terrace, and my friends at Club Fit, the Beck and Koelsch families and David Swope.

If I stood here all night, I couldn’t thank all the folks I want to. But I have to acknowledge Liz Marques of BOCES, the wonderful human being who produced that video, over many hours, late into the night, on her own time.

And thank you for sitting patiently through the video. We wanted the video to show that the one person more than any other responsible for Harrison Apar Field of Dreams Foundation working as well as it does is not me, or Elyse, or Elissa but … Harrison Apar.

The reason Harrison became the person he is standing next to me. No child could have a better parent, and no father could have a better partner, than I have in my wife Elyse. 

We never have been prouder of Harrison than we are at this moment. And it’s very meaningful for us that with us tonight are his grandparents Roz and Dr. Leonard Middleman, who live in Florida, as well as his Uncle Marc, his Aunt Linda and his cousin Lauren. [ASK THEM TO STAND]

I believe that Harrison was put on this earth – for 15 years — for a beneficent purpose. I believe his purpose was to teach those around him to make the best of the gifts we are given and not to complain about the gifts we are not given. I believe Harrison made me a better person while he was here, and continues to make me a better person wherever he may be. I believe that when it was Harrison’s time to go — when we lost our son — we were given in return the responsibility to do the work with his Foundation that we so love to do.

Every night since March 21, 2003 — for the last 2,511 days — before I go to bed, I go to Harrison’s room. I flick on the light switch, and flick it off. That’s my way of letting Harrison know that his light still shines.

Thank you for letting his light shine tonight one more time for all to see.